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Derek Earl Houghton Poems

Welcome my blog. The intention is to publish every piece of writing that I have churned out for the past 10 years. Some pieces have a story behind the story, some lyrical poems have become songs. We have hundreds of poems, stories, songs, lyrics, and life musings. Subscribe and every Monday receive a story to start off your week. Art is created by Amina & AI.

If you wish to raise your vibration forget all the Woo Woo.


Do something nice.


Then sit back and  wait to get fitted for your snappy new Halo.


Derek Earl Houghton



 
 
 

Two fucking  bastards walk into a cappuccino  bar.

First fucking bastard says to the second fucking  bastard:

When did you first realize you where a fucking  bastard.

Second Fucking  Bastard : Who are you calling a fucking  bastard.

First fucking  bastard: I lent you fifty bucks a month ago

and you promised to pay it back .

Second bastard : You said you would

pay for half the gas during  our drive share to the office.

Haven’t seen  a penny. It’s been going on three months now.

First Fucking Bastard.: Ok. How many six dollar cappuccinos

did I pay for just because you won’t

talk to that arrogant barista.

Second  Fucking Bastard: So you’re saying its a wash.

First Fucking Bastard. Im saying’ we’re even. Yes. Its a wash.

Second Bastard: Who does that barista

think he is anyways. He doesn’t even do

flower swirls on my crema. Arrogant prick.

First Fucking Bastard: The girl barista t that works Mondays

with the ring in her nose and the tear  tattooed under her eye.

She does an amazing flower swirl in the crema

First Bastard.: I know. For six bucks I want hydrangeas

No! Correction. I want a fucking bouquet of hydrangeas!

Second  Fucking Bastard. Hes a fucking bastard.

First Bastard: That’s high praise for someone that thinks he’s above

making flower swirls in crema. He’s doesn’t have the qualifications

to be a Fucking Bastard..

Second Fucking  Bastard : You can say that again.

First Fucking Bastard: Why?

Second Fucking Bastard: For emphasis.

First Fucking  Bastard: I think I have made the point adequately .

Second Fucking Bastard: Jesus Christ! Alright then. Do you take premium or unleaded.

First Fucking Bastard: I also think it’s your turn to pay for the coffee.

Second Fucking Bastard: You really piss me off sometimes.

First Fucking Bastard: You like it when I take advantage of you. Admit it.


Derek Earl Houghton


 
 
 

Tears generally suggest profound sadness , grief, and on some occasions joy.

Peeling onions can be used to fake such emotions , should ever the need arise.


Derek Earl Houghton

 
 
 
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